This past week has been spent with my husband’s family in another state. At first I was reluctant, as I always am when I am moved out of my comfort zone. I felt the pull of my ego to stay in familiar surroundings, doing familiar things. No surprises. Little chance of having to step up to the plate and make any big decisions. However, getting my heart involved instead of my old behavior patterns was simple to do this year. The burden of selfish self-centeredness is only a passing memory and has afforded me many ah-hah’s and adventures that make that kind of resistance an insane waste of energy.
Today, it is like wearing a suit of armor during a yoga class…
Stepping out of our comfort zone takes courage, especially if you have struggled with addiction, abuse, or a history of trauma. The ‘not-knowing’ factor has always been my biggest hurdle to overcoming fear. As a child growing up in an alcoholic home, I was forced to become adept at predicting the behaviors of others around me. I felt compelled to be one step ahead of the sickness in my home in order to protect myself and my younger siblings. Though being on guard for danger served me well in that alcoholic household, it stifled my spiritual and emotional growth for many years. I went into every job, relationship and experience with my arms in front of my face protecting me from all sorts of imaginary demons and events. This kind of emotional armor also kept me from experiencing life the way I wanted to. Trying to predict the future, so I wasn’t surprised or hurt, blocked everything I wanted from my life - and I didn’t know it.
For years I have been whittling away at that “not-knowing gremlin” that seemingly thrives on my desire to want something new or different in my life. Learning how to get myself out of the way - of myself, has been an interesting and rewarding task that has taken many paths. My own curiosity about what kinds of things are out there to help me grow has been my greatest gift (well that and good therapy). Each step of the way has brought me to a new career, city, marriage, and happiness in the “second half” of life. Today I plan my future by being actively grateful for my present, and in doing this it has lessened my need to “predict” because I am at peace with what “is” right now.
I trained as a Life Coach to help others get to their present quickly, to find ways to harness all the energy that is available to them, and to move into the kind of future that they want. Every time a client moves to a new place of understanding, I am grounded in my own present. There are so many ways to find happiness and fulfillment. I pray that in the coming year as I grow and learn, that my readers and clients will find something that will switch on that power and understanding that rockets them into a new dimension of living.
So…What do you want this year to bring into your life?
Every blog I share comes from the heart and has a challenge or a question within it to help others explore new ways of thinking. I hope that as you read the blogs you would consider starting conversation by commenting. We can learn so much together!