When I struggle with my own self-doubt it causes me to retreat and it is difficult to get out of that retracted and closed-off way of showing up in the world. In an effort to shoo away my “gremlin” of self-doubt, I made it a point to engage as many people in conversation or eye contact as possible while out running errands this week. A smile opens me up, makes be visible to others, and gives me a way to affect others in a positive way. How incredibly fun it was! The tall lanky young man in the “storm troopers” hoodie, the older gent I challenged to a race with our shopping carts, the beautiful woman in the hijab who returned my smile in the most angelic and knowing way. My fearless daughters who loved to engage with others comes to mind…now I know how much pleasure they derived from making contact with so many interesting people. Playfully walking through life is so damned empowering!! Why would I want anything less than this?
This is how I want to live my life today. Not cowering and angry and fearful of the world around me. That draws to me those things that eat at my soul. My attitude about life kept me in endless misery, a recording in my head and body that was on a loop - and I couldn’t find the off switch. I chose misery, and in turn misery gladly took up housekeeping in my spirit. Every time I stepped out into the world I carried that with me…like Charles Schultz beloved character “Pig Pen”, I had a cloud of dirt constantly surrounding me.
For me it took a desire to want more in my life and the willingness to look for something better. Learning what it felt like after going through the process to get there took faith in something bigger than me. Ideas, entity, power, peace….what it was didn’t matter so much as deciding I wanted “it” whatever “it” was. Though I have gone through many processes to get here there is no one thing that flipped the switch for me. It was a change in perspective and attitude. I became curious what I could do to live a better life. When I did that…the how’s and why’s just showed up. That is the miracle for me.
Give yourself the gift of sight today. Open your eyes, ease the sides of your mouth into a smile, let others see you do it. Then FEEL what connection can do.
What can you give others of yourself today? How will that empower you?
Every blog I share comes from the heart and has a challenge or a question within it to help others explore new ways of thinking. I hope that as you read the blogs you would consider starting conversation by commenting. We can learn so much together!